Experiment Time!

So, after the horrible week, last week, I am feeling much better. (Hopefully, that means that the children are feeling better, too.  Inevitably they were being affected by the high stress level in the house) I feel like, in some ways, we are (I am) going through a kind of grief cycle in dealing with this new reality. I started out ok, can-do and gung-ho, then felt angry, then weepy and now assured. We can do this! Maybe everyone faces new challenges this way? I don't know.

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The first hurdle for me was/is the new regime of a lot of new "do" and a lot of new "don't." It is absolutely torturous to my little mind to try to get everything done that is required of me--schooling all of the children (while carefully excluding instruction for some that will undermine the program, and emphasizing it to others...not very easy), executing specific exercises with the children at least 3 times a day (this was taking over an hour each time, at first), eating a very specific and limited diet (this is especially difficult when we are out of town for the day and everyone is whining "I'm hungry!"), taking everyone to the next-town-over three times a week for instruction in the Brain Balance center, not to  mention the regular load of laundry, dishes, caring for a newborn and being a wife.

Luckily for me, Aaron is a great partner and my dearest friend in life. He has more confidence in me than I do in myself. He continually gives me the grace I need to stretch out wings and try something different. And he also helps to make it all possible.

About Saturday night we were feeling pretty good again here at home. Aaron and I did some more research into food choices and ideas.

I have come to realize that it is a mistake to limit my focus so much on wheat (and gluten) and the deprivation of it. In America we eat wheat and we utilize wheat as if it were the only grain around.  Sometimes we throw in rice or oats for funsies, but pretty much, wheat is king--at least, the only grain worthy of eating in bread and breadstuffs, right?  But that is like limiting your diet's protein to just, well, chicken. Sure, chicken is versatile and yummy and everything, but it is not a deal-breaker to knock it out of the diet, right? What about beef, pork, fish, nuts, beans, lentils, and other grains? As soon as I realized this comparison, my mind was off and I finally felt free. I need to experiment with other grains and starches. Heck! I live in America. Pretty much anything I want, food-wise, I can get. We are unbelievably spoiled!

So I tried using alternate "flours." But recipes offered by many people tasted off, not-quite there, and depressing. For example, I made some pumpkin muffins with almond "flour" as per a few recipes I found. Not good. Not what I wanted. Way too dense. Blah. Ditto with the coconut flour. Ok, so those are out as a major source of structure.

So, I used a gluten-free all-purpose flour (that was recommended by Bon Apetit Magazine) and tried the pumpkin muffins again. The first ingredient in that flour blend is garbanzo bean flour which equals a little better structure and nutrition. But the finished product still tasted, to me, like a copycat--trying to get there but not. It was too gluey and, for me only, tasted faintly like garbanzo bean (this kids loved them). Most other "gluten-free flour" and "gluten-free baking mixes" I have seen relies on sugar and white rice or potato starch/tapioca starch to get the job done. (Not very nutritious, not very flavorful and not good mouth-feel--all important characteristics for me.) So I was getting very confused and depressed.

Then I found a food-science book dealing with the structure and nutritional differences of different grains! Voila! We are talking Teff, Amaranth, Millet, etc, etc, etc. Combined with different starches like potato, tapioca, arrowroot; and some binders like xanthan gum and flaxseed, I KNOW that we can make some incredible and delicious food. Oh, and nutritious too.

Be still my beating heart.